Mama's Day!

This day last year, I celebrated my first Mother's Day since I had a baby in my belly... It's crazy to think about how I had no idea then what I know now about the joy of being a Mama! I had no idea that I was having a boy, what his name would be, or how he would steal my heart. This morning Brad gave me a card and at the end of what he wrote he said, "You have found your calling". It's like he put into words exactly how I feel (and gave me the biggest compliment ever!)... I'm so thankful that I LOVE being a mom and feel like I was made for this! 7 months into this, I am so in love... And I have learned a few things...

1. Drive slow over speed bumps when you have a sleeping baby in the car (or avoid them all together if possible).
2. I can get a full day's work done during a 2 hour nap!
3. Tucker's giggle can turn my whole day around!
4. To appreciate all my diapers that my mom changed!
5. I've never needed more patience...
6. A baby can't cry forever.
7. Marriage can be sweeter and harder all at the same time.
8. "Firsts" never get old!
9. There is no shame in singing at the top of my lungs and doing a silly dance, if it will make my boy smile!
10. I can try as hard as I can to make this predictable, BUT... (this sentence could be ended in so many different ways!)

On this day, I'm grateful for the privilege of being a Mom to Tucker... No one else was made for this job but me... AMAZING!

We are also so grateful for our moms today as well... Thank you for the way you have loved us well for all these years and for the ways you love Tucker now too! We can honestly say that we appreciate you much more now after these 7 months!

Life Shared

Today I walked through life with my friend... It was a hold a child's hand while blood's being drawn, walk laps around the hall until the baby stops crying, hold down baby while his whole body gets xrayed, talk to doctors, get no answers, sleep-deprived kind of day.

I got to spend a little more than 24 hours with my best friend Sharon and her little BOY Bosten at Duke Children's Hospital. What a tough place to be. Everywhere you look there is another story of a life that has been hit hard by health issues. It is so surreal that my friend is one of those people and it is even more difficult that they are in the middle of a long journey of the unknown. This is certainly one of the more difficult things I've ever walked through with a friend, yet it is something that will forever mark our friendship and our lives.

Let me tell you something about my friend Sharon... She is an AMAZING mom. She is so patient even though the crying is enough to send you over the edge...She is calm even when everything around her is telling her to be stressed out...She is full of smiles for her little boy even though she is sleep deprived...She is TRUSTING our God with her little boy, even though it would be easy to take it all into her own hands. I am being challenged and shaped by watching her go through this trial and I could only hope that I would persevere like she is in this valley. To me, this is what LIFE is all about. Walking together--in the trenches and up on the mountain tops. What a gift that we don't have to live this life alone. This is a tough road, but there's nowhere I'd rather be than walking right beside my friend.

Please continue to pray for sweet BOSTEN and Ryan, Sharon, and Elle. Keep up with the latest updates on their caring bridge page!

"If it ain't broke, don't fix it...don't even mess with it at all!"

Ok, so thought you might want an update on the "stop swaddling, go from sleeping on the back to the belly" attempt. It went horrible, that's the update. I basically cooped myself up in the house all day and tried different things at each nap--putting him in a sleepsack instead of a swaddle, on his back, putting him on his belly in the sleepsack, sometimes using the sleep positioner... it all failed miserably. He didn't sleep well for any nap and the day ended with him still being really fussy after bedtime, which is never the case.

This is what I've learned:
1. "If it ain't broke don't fix it"... Tucker loves to be swaddled and he sleeps great on his back, so on the back and swaddled he will be!
2. Don't make mommy decisions based on what you "think you're supposed to do" or on what you hear is age-appropriate...do what's best for YOUR baby!

Today, we swaddled Tucker and put him on his side or back in the sleep postioner like usual and despite being at church, someone else's house, and off his schedule a little because of everything going on, he still slept WAY better than he did all day yesterday!

"The Wendy's Incident"

We did it! We left Missouri yesterday morning at 8 am (central time) and got home last night at 10 pm! What a trip! 1,325.6 miles to be exact! It was the dreaded drive home and it actually wasn't too bad... Tucker hung in there as good as any 3 month old could...he wasn't even that fussy, just anxious to get out of the car seat position. Just this week it seemed like he was trying to sit up more so you could tell he wasn't loving being reclined in his seat.

"The Wendy's Incident" would be referring to our stop in the Wendy's parking lot for me to feed and change Tucker. This resulted in Tucker and myself having to change clothes! Lots of POOP people! Why does this only happen when you're in the car, in a weird feeding position, with a change of clothes hard to reach in a suitcase, and your husband inside ordering your lunch? The irony is that the other time we had this same scene, we were on a road trip, in a Wendy's parking lot! So, that will be our coined phrase for a really bad diaper and we seriously might consider not stopping at another Wendy's when needing to change Tucker!
We're so thankful to be home...we ALL slept great last night in our own beds. Looks like Charlotte's going to get some snow tonight, so we'll keep you posted on that!

Favorite Baby Items

Well, after 3 months of being in the baby world, I'm certainly no expert, but it doesn't take long to figure out what works, what doesn't, and what you absolutely can't leave home without! So, to all you moms/future moms out there or people that want to give gifts to moms, here are some of our favorite things!

The Miracle Blanket
This is not called the "miracle" blanket for no reason! This swaddling blanket, AKA straight jacket, keeps Tucker perfectly swaddled and snug as a bug. The material is like that of T-shirt sheets so it moves and stretches easily and is very difficult for him to maneuver out of. Another bonus to this blanket is that their feet go into a pocket at the bottom and you can take their feet out of it without unswaddling the rest of them--this is GREAT for transferring them into a car seat or the swing without removing the blanket! We LOVE this blanket so much that we might swaddle Tucker till he's 5! For you locals, here is a list of stores in the Charlotte area that you can find them and of course, you can purchase it online.

Sleep Positioner by Boppy

There are some bad sleep positioners out there... we bought 3 before we found one that worked! This one by Boppy is great. It feels like memory foam, which makes for a very soft surface for your little one (especially in the first few weeks that Tucker was in the pack and play that doesn't have a so soft surface). It is inclined, which can be helpful for reflux but also just a more comfortable position for them. The two "bumpers" on it have strong velcro that keeps them in place--that was the major fault of other sleep positioners we tried--and this is perfect for positioning them on their side, which Tucker has loved! The cover can be easily removed to wash. One great thing about using a sleep positioner is that it doesn't matter where we lay Tucker down because he's only used to the positioner--not the crib, pack and play, etc. So, it has made him very versatile with traveling, being at friend's houses, etc. Don't waste your money on any other sleep positioner!

Baby Einstein Play Mat

Lying on this mat is Tucker's favorite time of the day! I'm sure there are other play mats out there similar to this one, but what makes this one stand apart from some is the star at the top that lights up and plays music. Tucker is captivated by the lights and while he's lying there he can't stop kicking (I like to say dancing) to the music! There are also great toys hanging down that he's just started to grab for. Finally, this play mat folds up great and is easy to travel with. We have taken it with us on our last few trips and it is a great activity no matter where we are!

The BOB

Dear BOB, oh how we love thee. This stroller is awesome! I will preface the rest by saying that this stroller isn't the cheapest one on the block, but so far, I would say it's worth the money. We really wanted a stroller that would last for a few kids. And we also made the decision not to get a "regular stroller" but instead the BOB and the "snap and go", so that made us feel a little better about a nicer jog stroller. A few great things about it:
-The front wheel can be locked into place or it can be a swivel wheel (most strollers are one or the other)
-There is an infant car seat adapter--you can lock the car seat into this stroller whereas most jog strollers don't have this option and can't hold a baby until they're several months old since they have to lay down in it--you do have to purchase this seperately
-There is a windshield you can pull over the top to keep the cold or wind out
-The wheels can make it on any surface--road, mountains, beach (looking forward to trying that!)
-It comes in really fun colors, like this orange and brown one--of course the color we chose :)
We purchased ours at REI and since we have a store here, that will be convenient if we ever have a problem with it!
Happy BOBing!

There are probably a few more things I could put on this list, but these are the top products I would recommend with confidence!
If you have questions or other suggestions to add, leave a comment! I have definitely found that the best resource I have is all of my other mommy friends!

BitterSweet

Okay, so this video is a major tearjerker and absolute hysteria for this hormonal post-pregnant woman... So I apologize in advance if you shed a few tears. This is a beautiful story of appreciating everyday as if it's the only day and a great reminder for me to be thankful for my healthy little boy! I don't know this couple but am amazed at their faith and perspective in the midst of this heartbreaking trial they have endured!

Great Builders

At my recent baby shower, my dear friend, Jenn, read this out loud to encourage me as I begin the journey of motherhood... I was so challenged by this point of view and hope that I can carry this perspective with me! Hope it's encouragement to all you mommies out there and to anyone else in whatever life stage you might be in!

I'M INVISIBLE – Nicole Johnson

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking,” Can’t you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer, "What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order,” Right around 5:30, please." I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude -but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a hair clip and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, "I bought you this." It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn’t exactly sure why she’d given it to me until I read her inscription: "To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.” In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals – we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into abeam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it." And the workman replied,” Because God sees." I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte. I seethe sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become."
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he’s bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I’d built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add,” You’re gonna love it there."
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Great Job, MOM

…”whatever your task, work heartily, as serving the Lord and not men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward; you are serving the Lord Christ”. (Colossians 3:23-24 - RSV)

"If you want to get big, you gotta lift something heavy"

This is a great quote that we heard this past Sunday from a guest speaker at a church we've been visiting for awhile now, Life Fellowship. Brian Loritts was an amazing communicator of truth and we were encouraged, challenged, and enlightened by him! He spoke out of 1 Corinthians 9 and what it means to finish strong". He was comparing the Christian life to a marathon in that it's a long journey, there are bumps along the way, and it doesn't really matter how you start, just that you finish, and finish strong. He told this great story of an encounter he had with his football coach in high school as he was trying to lift what seemed like an impossible amount of weight on the bars... After saying "I can't lift this weight" several times, his coach simply said, "If you want to get big, you gotta lift something heavy". What a wise statement for life... I don't know about you, but I find it so much more appealing to take "the easy road" a lot of the time. Not only do I not want to run a marathon, I don't even really like to get on the treadmill for 15 minutes. I'm so thankful for the reminder that the times in life that I feel most full and rich are when I've been forced to "lift something heavy"... and graciously, God doesn't allow me to have to carry the weight any longer than I can handle it. Since Sunday, Brad and I have repeated this quote several times and I hope it continues to be burned into our hearts and minds for a long time!

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win. Everyone who competes in the games exercises self-control in all things. They then do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. Therefore I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified. 1 Corinthians 9:24-29 (NAS)

All packed up with a pretty little bow...

Well, anyone who has talked to me lately knows I've been doing A LOT of packing... we're closing on our new house tomorrow, so we've just about got our entire house in boxes or some form of packaging. As I have been in the midst of this process, I've had several moments of delight. You see, I have a deep satisfaction in starting a task and completing it...like bubble wrapping and paper coating, fitting things perfectly into a box, and closing it up with the perfect amount of tape (double tape that is). There is something about putting away things neatly in a box, sealing it up, and not seeing it anymore. (I know this is making a lot of you "unneat people" want to punch me through the computer :) But, isn't life like this? I love to organize and pack up all of my struggles, thoughts, and issues into boxes, double taping them to ensure that no one is able to see what's really going on... And unfortunately, I've gotten pretty good at this strategy. So, I continue on my slow-paced journey of learning the hard way, of course (is there any other way to learn things?), that I am loved--NOT because I "have it all together", but actually because I'm quite a mess and am in great need of THE ONE who does have it all together... I'm so thankful to people in my life that love me this way and to my God, who happens to be passionate about people with "junk" in their lives. I hope I can grow to be more comfortable with "my junk" out sometimes for other people to see, knowing that I'm not defined by how "neatly my boxes are packed". And at least for now, maybe I'll just be reminded of this when I'm unpacking all of the boxes in the new house! You are sure to see a mess if you come visit us anytime soon and I'll try really hard not to apologize for it! :)